In a small village on the island of El Hierro, surrounded by volcanic mountains and dirt roads, lived Mario, a very old gardener, known to everyone for having the most beautiful corner of the entire island. His garden was not only a space full of colors and aromas, but a place where people who entered did not want to leave, because they felt so much peace, as if the plants spoke to their souls.
One summer afternoon, Mateo, a very curious boy, had been observing that garden from afar for days, and he couldn't understand why Mario's flowers seemed to shine more than his family's.
—Mario, how do you make your garden so beautiful? —Mateo asked, with innocence shining in his pupils.
The old man smiled and, leaning on his cane, said:
—Come, Mateo, I'm going to reveal my secret to you.
They walked along white sand paths until they reached a very secluded place. There, instead of common flowers, plants with very unique names grew. A small wooden sign accompanied each one.
—Here I cultivate —said Mario solemnly— the NOs that you cannot afford.
Mateo frowned, surprised.
—The NOs? What does that mean?
—Well, my boy —replied the old man—. They are boundaries that protect our soul. Listen carefully.
He stopped in front of a rose bush with intense red petals, the Samantha rose, velvety.
—This one is called DO NOT allow them to shout at you. People sometimes believe that raising their voice gives them a lot of power. But a shout hurts like an invisible knife. True respect is spoken in a low voice, whispered, as if caressing the heart.
Further on, he pointed to a small tree with soft leaves.
—This is DO NOT speak to yourself with hatred. You know? Many times the cruelest voice does not come from outside, but from within, and we hurt ourselves. If you don't learn to treat yourself with affection, no praise in the world or from people will reach you.
Mateo looked at him attentively, as if discovering a completely new world.
Mario took him to a beautiful bougainvillea, fuchsia in color, that climbed happily along a fence.
—This one is called DO NOT justify disrespect. Being understanding does not mean putting up with the unacceptable. When someone breaks respect, it is not love or true friendship: it is disrespecting for free.
They walked to a tall sunflower that turned looking for the sun.
—This is DO NOT say "yes" just to please. If you always live pleasing everyone, your own sun goes out. Learning to say "no" is like learning to breathe and letting the light lead us by the hand.
A little further on there was a pot with basil. The air smelled strong and fresh. It was very comforting.
—This is DO NOT silence your emotions for fear of conflict. Keeping everything to yourself is not peace, son, it is collapsing slowly. Speaking with respect, even if it hurts, makes the soul catch its breath.
They continued walking to a white lily, open like a star.
—This lily is called DO NOT constantly compare yourself. Each flower blooms in its own time and in its own way. It makes no sense for a rose to want to be a carnation, or for the river to want to be an ocean. Your value does not depend on the life of others.
Finally, they came to some tall, firm pine trees that provided shade.
—And these are very important —said the old man—. They are called DO NOT normalize environments that drain you. If you plant in poisoned soil, your roots wither. If you live in places where they don't value you, your spirit weakens. Always look for fertile soils where you can grow and where you are unique and a priority.
Mateo was fascinated.
—So, these NOs are like walls?
Mario smiled.
—No, son. They are not walls, they are roots. Thanks to them you can stand, grow tall and strong. When you learn to take care of yourself with these NOs, the great YESs of life appear: the yes to peace, the yes to respect, the yes to true love, the yes to freedom.
Finally, next to a light vine that intertwined with the trunk of an old pear tree, Mario placed a sign somewhat worn by the sun.
—This one —he said in a soft voice— is very important: DO NOT hide those who love you, because one day it will happen to you. Sometimes, out of fear or pride, we hide the people who take care of us and love us. We think that they will make us weak or that others will judge us. But hiding love is denying yourself warmth when it is most needed; and when you are the one who needs support, you may discover that you will have no one to turn to. Sometimes we do it with our parents because we want to appear older.
The boy was silent. He felt that Mario's words were too big for him, but he also knew that seeds were germinating in his heart.
—This is perhaps the most important of all. It is called NO to child abuse. Children are like very fragile buds: if they are shouted at, hit or humiliated, their roots tremble and their branches will grow crooked. Every child needs care, patience and love to become a strong tree. Abusing children is like breaking a beautiful flower before it begins to bloom.
That afternoon, when he returned home, Mateo looked for a corner of land in the yard. With the help of his father, he decided to make his own garden. He didn't understand much about plants, but he was clear about something: he wanted to sow in his life those NOs that would give him the strength to grow with dignity and respecting himself.
Seeds of wisdom
«When the mystery is too impressive, it is impossible to disobey.»
Benito Pérez Galdós (Misericordia)
«The poor man lives from the hand of others, and must kiss it even if he resents it.»
Pedro García Cabrera
«Kindness is not bitten: it is kept like bread broken at the table of the world.»
Alonso Quesada (Naive Poems)
«Ingratitude is tearing the seed from the one who offers you the harvest.»
Juani Alemán Hernández